I do not understand you. I never will. You are effing strange. Let’s agree to disagree on everything. I will still act cordial toward you at parties. No more reality TV and wine nights, though. We’re over.
“She’s entitled to like any flower she wants and she didn’t want to hurt the feeling of the hydrangeas of the world. No disrespect to the hydrangeas lovers of the world but she prefers different types of flowers.”—Dear Madonna, This statement by your “people” does not make it better. You are a jerk. If I ever become this ungrateful in life OR employ someone who allows me to be this ungrateful, please shoot me. (In case you missed it here.) Oh, if I ever begin speaking in a pseudo-British accent on a daily basis, also shoot me. Thanks. Unless of course I actually move to Britain in which case it may happen and I won’t realize it. But at that point I’m just trying to fit in. Cheerio. (bang)